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Dogs That Detect Bedbugs

CRUISER made four house calls on a recent rain-soaked Tuesday. There were two happy endings and two unhappy ones, a fairly typical outcome for a typical day in the life of a bedbug-sniffing puggle.

“Except that there’s nothing typical about this business,” said his handler, Jeremy Ecker, 35, whose six-month-old company, the Bed Bug Inspectors, has vetted hotels, college dorms and Midtown office buildings, suburban homes, bare-bones Brooklyn rentals and tony Manhattan co-ops. (Mr. Ecker, who charges $350 for a residential inspection, is an independent inspector, meaning he has no affiliation with an exterminator, though many hire him to check a property they have treated.)

Increasingly, real estate lawyers are urging buyers in contract to inspect apartments before they close, and in their advertising, many pest control companies exhort would-be tenants to “inspect before you rent.” And dogs like Cruiser can inspect a room in minutes, whereas lesser mammals like human beings need hours to conduct a visual inspection.

Bedbug-sniffing dogs, adorable yet stunningly accurate — entomology researchers at the University of Florida report that well-trained dogs can detect a single live bug or egg with 96 percent accuracy — are the new and furry front line in an escalating and confounding domestic war.

While experts cite a host of reasons for the upsurge, they agree on one thing: the bugs, which were mostly eradicated in this country at midcentury by now-banned pesticides like DDT but remained a constant scourge overseas, are finding their way back to the United States through an increase in global travel.

And in cities like New York, where neighbors are often separated only by bricks and mortar, one person’s infestation is everybody’s problem, since bedbugs can crawl through walls and along wiring and pipes, and hitchhike on clothing, furniture, luggage and more. In this city of 8.3 million, it seems as if everyone has a bedbug story.

Just ask Gale A. Brewer, a self-appointed bedbug evangelist and a City Council member from the Upper West Side. She prodded the Mayor’s office to convene a bedbug advisory committee last fall, after years of what she and others felt were woeful public policy inadequacies in the face of the relentless advances of what some have called “the pest of the century.” (The committee — entomologists, civic policy experts and advocates for children, the elderly and others — will issue its recommendations next month.)

The breadth and scope of the problem has been captured anecdotally in anguished tales — the family living in a tent outside their lovely-but-infested Long Island home, the woman in the Upper West Side one-bedroom who spent $9,500 on extermination and lived out of plastic bags, at friends’ apartments, for three months — posted on blogs like bedbugger and newyorkvsbedbugs, the likes of which have been spreading like, well, bedbugs, over the last few years. They are told over and over at community board hearings presided over by Ms. Brewer and others, and recorded in mainstream media. Another picture, though still incomplete, comes from the city’s Department of Housing Preservation and Development, which has been tracking bedbug complaints and violations through calls to the 311 help line. Consider that six years ago, there were 537 bedbug complaints and 82 violations (in other words, verified infestations); last year, complaints topped out at nearly 11,000, with 4,084 violations cited (nearly double that of the previous year).

But the complaints registered with the department and 311 relate only to rental properties; reports of bedbugs scampering through the private sanctums of hotels, co-ops and condos, colleges and office buildings remain largely uncounted, though real estate lawyers and brokers report that co-op minutes reveal a world that’s just as infested as the rest of the city.

In the last three months, and for the first time in her 21-year career, for example, Lori Braverman, a Manhattan real estate lawyer, advised buyers she was representing in three deals to inspect apartments they were in contract for, having noted in the co-op boards’ minutes instances of bedbugs in their buildings. “One was described as a ‘significant infestation,’” she said. “It’s the deep, dark secret of co-ops and condos.” (All three checked out clean, including a classic five on the Upper West Side inspected by Cruiser.) Still, as Ms. Brewer said darkly, “Those bugs are everywhere.”

After a day or two with Cruiser, one would have to agree.

NINE-THIRTY in the morning in Borough Park, Brooklyn, at the home of a family of seven, two of them still in diapers: the family was poised to move to a new house, their things in boxes, the rooms askew, to the horror of the mother, who had to welcome a reporter and a photographer into the pre-move disarray. (Like all the bedbug sufferers in this story, she asked not to be identified because of the stigma surrounding the pests.)

Cruiser had been invited because the mother had found a dead bedbug floating in the bath of one child the night before, and she wanted to make sure, if there was an infestation, that it didn’t travel to their new home. The house next door had had a problem, she said, and she knew bedbugs travel easily through walls. All this was related to Mr. Ecker, while Oscar Rincon, his colleague, waited outside with Cruiser.

“I don’t want to know the details,” Mr. Rincon said later, lest the knowledge affect his body language and interfere with the dog’s inspection.

Mr. Rincon, 42, is an old friend of Mr. Ecker’s who worked for years at the North Shore Animal League. He and Mr. Ecker, Cruiser and his partner, a beagle called Freedom, were all trained for their work at J&K Canine Academy in High Springs, Fla., where rescue dogs are schooled in the scent detection of termites, bedbugs, bombs, some cancers and canker, a scourge on citrus crops. The school has an ongoing relationship with the University of Florida, which has been testing its results.

In two weeks training with Cruiser and Freedom, Mr. Ecker and Mr. Rincon learned how to hide live hives of bedbugs — little gangs of bugs tucked into vials fitted with mesh covers, so the scent can travel, but the bugs stay put — and work with the dogs in constantly changing scenarios (hiding bugs in high cupboards, in drawers, under rugs and so forth). Like all scent-detecting dogs, Cruiser and Freedom work for food; put another way, they are fed only when they find their target, which keeps them accurate and keen on their jobs.

This poses challenges, however, for a dog handler. Back home in Fresh Meadows, Queens, Mr. Ecker discovered pretty quickly that his new career required an extreme lifestyle commitment. Not only would he have to live with bedbugs to train and feed his new roommates, Cruiser and Freedom, he would have to feed the bugs, too. Remember that dinner for a bedbug is a nice long quaff of human blood; Mr. Ecker rolled up a sleeve to reveal a horrifying tattoo of old bites. (Bedbugs don’t carry disease, but their bites can itch like crazy.)

Happily, the bugs need to eat only once a month or less, he said. “It’s not so bad. You can hardly feel it.”

A few days later at his home, Mr. Ecker demonstrated, tipping a vial of bugs onto his forearm, which the critters latched on to like hungry newborns, their bodies quickly swelling with blood. Meanwhile, Mr. Rincon was cleaning vials, ensuring that the dogs learn to detect only live bugs and eggs. He swept the debris — bedbug feces, maybe some eggs — into plastic cups, which he filled with water and stuck in the freezer, since extreme temperatures are proven bug snuffers.

“You have to be very focused,” Mr. Ecker said. “You can’t sneeze, or answer the phone. The cat has to be out of the room. Want to try?”

BACK in Borough Park, Cruiser had started to work. Mr. Rincon wiped his paws with a towel and began leading him around the house. The family’s boxed possessions, stacked in the basement, were quickly vetted. But a wooden crib in a child’s room gave Cruiser pause. The father turned it back to front and the dog began pawing the mattress, signaling an alert. (What Cruiser does is detect the scent of a bug or an egg; it’s up to an exterminator, said Mr. Ecker, to visually confirm the presence of bedbugs in the spots a dog has noted.)

The mother exhaled slowly. “That’s where my 2 ½-year-old sleeps,” she said. She had the expression, a sort of satisfied wince, familiar to parents everywhere, when a nagging suspicion — the toe is broken, the teeth need braces, the itchy scalp is really lice — has been confirmed.

Returning Cruiser to a crate in the back of his white Subaru Outback, Mr. Ecker, who had been in the extermination business for six years, reflected on his new career. Since he and Mr. Rincon returned from Florida in September, they’ve done hundreds of inspections. Despite the ick factor, “it’s very rewarding work,” he said. “We get to walk dogs for a living and we help people get peace of mind.”

Mr. Rincon added: “We see people who literally haven’t slept for weeks. They think everything is a bedbug. At a place in Jersey, the wife was a total wreck. She’d saved 15 samples of stuff, thinking it was bedbugs.”

It was mostly lint, as it turned out.

A mother of 7-month-old twins in a bedroom community outside of New York was not so lucky. It was Cruiser’s last stop of the day; after Borough Park, he’d inspected a Midtown office and an apartment in Riverdale. Both were bedbug-free, the day’s happy endings. Outside the city, the rain was still coming down in sheets. A Manhattan-dwelling relative of the mother had had bedbugs, perhaps the source, she said, of her house’s infestation, which she had had heat-treated, at a cost of $5,000. (Many sufferers with animals or young children choose this nontoxic method, in which very hot air is channeled into a space.)

She and her husband and their young family had decamped to a hotel. Back in her pristinely renovated 19th-century brick row house a week later, however, she was convinced she was being bitten again. The woman extended a graceful bare foot with a large, angry welt on the arch. She had called the pest control company she had used, but they were backed up on inspections and couldn’t promise a dog for another week. “I can’t wait that long,” she said.

When Cruiser arrived, he greeted the woman by placing his paws on her knees.

“Does that mean I’ve got them?” she wondered. “I feel like one big bug. If I can get through this, having twins isn’t going to be an issue.”

Cruiser spent 15 minutes at the house and alerted four times, scratching a parlor-floor loveseat, an upholstered side chair nearby, the mother’s side of the bed and a small black suitcase in a closet.

The mother’s eyes welled. “I have to remember no one is sick, no one has cancer,” she said. “Is it possible, when we went to the hotel, I brought them with me and then brought them back?”

“It’s possible,” Mr. Ecker said. “I’m sorry.”

Cruiser insinuated his wet nose into the reporter’s hand, and she scratched his silky ears.

Back in the car, she wondered: Shouldn’t the mother wrap the couch, the chair and the suitcase in plastic? What about her mattress? Does the inspection mean that heat treatment doesn’t work? Should the reporter, who had taken off her muddy boots in the house, throw away her socks?

Mr. Ecker shook his head. “What if I tell her to do one thing and it contradicts the pest-control company’s plans?” he said, referring to the client. “There’s nothing wrong with heat. There’s more than one way to cut apples.”

He added: “We’ve never taken a bug home with us. They’re not like fleas. They don’t jump on you.”

Bedbugs need time to get to know you, he explained. A short visit to a bedbug lair poses no risks. Still, as Mr. Rincon pointed out, “I never sit down.”

Moving Them Out

In the last several years, bedbug infestations have increased exponentially in New York City, but so have the resources to deal with them. The city offers a guide at nyc.gov. Bedbugger.com, a blog, is a Baedeker for treatment and a group memoir; newyorkvsbedbugs.org focuses more on city policies than remediation.

Think you have bedbugs? Bites might be the first sign, but not everyone reacts the same way: on some they look like welts or hives, on others mosquito bites and some people don’t react at all. Once you’ve met a bedbug, though, you won’t mistake it for anything else. The bugs look different at each life stage: the eggs are clear and the size of a pencil point, the babies are semi-transparent and poppy seed-size and adults are rust-colored and as big as an apple seed. The city’s Web site advises using an exterminator that describes itself as an “integrated pest management” service; make sure it is registered with the New York State Department of Environmental Conservation; ( 718) 482-4994 or go to www.dec.ny.gov.

To reach the Bed Bug Inspectors: (917) 455-6865.

True Story: Battle Asses.


Date: 2007-05-02, 1:25PM CDT


Sorry, I don’t have anything to post about layoffs or politics, but I DO have another story from the Public Bathroom. Enjoy.

You are my arch nemisis. I see you wandering around as I go about my IT Computer Nerd business: Tall. Middle Eastern. Pot Belly. We catch each others eye every now and then and give each other a slight nod. I know you, I know what you do and I am on to your games.

I saw you this morning, we made eye contact. You nodded and took another bite of whatever Death-Ass producing garbage you fuel up on that makes the bathroom, smell like the inside of a dead monkey’s colon, and nodded at me. I got you this time, fucker.

I give you my icey grin and nod back, then hurry back to my office. It’s almost noon, and that’s the time you like to run to the toilet and preform your daily ASS JIHAD on all the people just trying to wash their hands. Maybe in your country there is no commen sense that would tell you that lunch time = hand wash time. People want to get clean and eat, not be fumigated with the high octane liquid shit attack you subjigate them too.

But I got you this time. Yeah fucker I GOT SOMETHING COOKING UP FOR YOU! Two egg sandwiches with cheese. Greasy sausage patties. A couple glasses of Tang. Some leftover Chinese food. A Twix. Root Beer Soda. Some steamed brocoli I had in the fridge. A Hot Pocket with peperonni and cheese. A Chocolate Poptart. And like a cherry on top … a McDonald’s Quaterpounder with cheese.

I never eat this shit, it’s all greasy and fucking nasty, but today is the day I fight back. I go out for a quick mile jog and almsot die. My stomach feels like there are two midgets fighting to the death inside there. I walk back to work, ass clenched tighter than a virgin’s thighs at Church.

Great. The hot chick from next door wants to chat. She assumes the sweat on my face and arms is from running. She doesn’t realize that it’s a cold sweat induced by my severe sphicter trauma. She finally shuts up and I stagger to the Death Ass Arena.

You are there already in your favorite stall: The one right next to the fucking sinks. You stupid, socially retarded fuck. Fine. You have yet to begin your daily purge of Middle Eastern Ass Stew. I enter the stall next to you and drop my pants in preperation of the upcomming battle.

Your opening slavo is fired: A sloppy wet fart with a solid-shot closer. I laugh and show you the power of Advanced American Foodstuffs.

The tuba fart I unleash echos off the walls and shrinks my waistline about an inch. The guy at the urinal laughs as I slap the wall between you and I and say “Back to YOU, Kajid!”. You are silent, I assume you know who I am and that the time has come for us to battle. I know you are summoning your intestinal fortitude for full out war.

You do not dissapoint me.

With a hissing “SSSShhhhhzzzzzzzzz!” you squirt out a deadly spray of ass juice that pollutes the air and makes my head swim. The pisser at the urinal is no longer laughing, he quickly zips up and runs for the door. He did not stop to wash his hands, instead opting to head for the hills. I cover my mouth and nose with my shirt and the black spots dissapear from my vision. My head clears. I am ready.

“AAaaaaaaaRRRRRGGGHHH!” I yell, as I drop Big Tim. That’s short for “Big Timber” … AKA “Mississippi Butt Log”.

Quick-fire farts stutter out of my ass, as I push the monster log from the Shit Dimension into our reality. The beefy, yeasty stench easily overpowers the Indian Ass Gutter oder of your previous attack. Mega Turd hits the water in the bowl with a mighty splash, the reek is that of a dead whale slowly ripening in the hot, tropical sun. I catch my breath and wipe my brow, and start to pat myself on the back. I should have known the battle was not over.

The only thing I can think of is that you must has completly unzipped your ass to your elbow. That’s the only way I could begin to explain the lumpy, creamy splashs falling out of your ass into the toilet. It sounds like you are pouring a gallon of strawberry shake with whole strawberries in it into the shitter. I see the hairs on my arms start to curl from the horrid stench wafting up from under your stall. I shudder and sway on my throne, unsure if I will survive.

I have no choice. I must employ the Deal Breaker. I hunker down and clench my hands together. My fingers twitch and entwine like a nest of snakes, almost like I am running through a series of ancient Ninja Hand Symbols. My feet lift up onto the toes and my legs start to shake.

“You want to play??” I growls. A low moaning comes from my stomach, like a dinosaur calling into a swampy, foggy night. “YOU GOT IT! AAAAAAHHHHHH!”

Like Cloud summoning The Knights of the Round in Final Fantasy 7, I summon the Excalibur of Turd Demons to destroy my enemy. Hot magma-like shit rockets out of my ass, releasing a noxious, sticky cloud of deadly recal perfume. I hear you gag and see your feet shuffle around, but you can’t get away, can you? No. You can’t.

Veins throb on my neck and temples as the turd monster tears itself from my bowels. My lips skin back from my now clenched teeth and I try not to scream. Your roll of toilet paper rolls into my stall. You must have torn it from the wall with numb fingers in an attempt to “Wipe and Scoot”. Too late. MUCH too late!

Oders pound you with merciless fists: Rotten Fruitcake stuffed with boiled chicken assholes. Hammered shit-logs served on a bed of week old white rice. Rosie O’Donnel’s racid crotch farts. The smell of your mom’s dank, hairy Middle Eastern armpits.

Your stall door bangs open and you stagger out. You take three unsteady steps to the door and can barely open it wide enough to slip out. I laugh at you before you leave. “Yeah! RUN, Fucker!” I yell, and laugh again. You say nothing.

It’s all over except for the clean up. Fuck with me again, you shit filled Anal Terrorist. Me and my ass will be waiting.

  • Location: Public Bathroom
  • it’s NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

PostingID: 323013997


Cop

I need a great actor (to act retarded) (Scottsdale)


Date: 2010-02-23, 11:31PM MST
Reply to: gigs-afbpj-1615305832@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]


So I was at a bar with a few friends and a bunch of their friends whom I did not know. We were talking about this whole Palin/Downs syndrome thing and I may have made some off color comments, which I really do regret wholeheartedly. When one of my friends’ friends called me out on said off color remarks- I froze up. They started to tear into me (rightfully so), and I did the only thing I could think of- claim to have a retarded sister. I know this is painfully shameful, but I need someone to act retarded for one night. Not like ‘I was so drunk I was retarded’ retarded, but like ‘I am actually retarded’ retarded. I’ll of course pay you, and match your salary with a donation to some special charity or something. Just one night – $150.

If I hire you, just one request. Don’t look me in the eye, I just can’t take it at this point. Also you have to be really into giraffes because I said something about that too. I don’t know, I just couldn’t shut up.

-ryan

  • Location: Scottsdale
  • it’s NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
  • Compensation: no pay

PostingID: 1615305832

cid:0

Sometimes, we try too hard to get to the greener grass.
In the process, we end up in trouble……..
And when you find yourself in trouble and
you’re stuck in a situation that you can’t get out of,
there is one thing you should always remember…..

Not everyone who shows up……
Is there to help you!!!!


cid:1

MEXICAN WORDS!! The teacher told Pepito to make sentences with his spelling words:

1. Cheese
Maria likes me but cheese ugly.
2. Mushroom
Wen all my family gets in the car, there isnt mushroom
3. Shoulder
My friend didnt no how to make tacos so i shoulder
4. Texas
My friend always texas me fwds
5. Herpes
Me and my friend shared a pizza, i got my piece and she got herpes
6. July
Ju told me ju were goin to the store and july to me!! Julyer!!
7. Rectum
I had two cars but my wife rectum
8. Chicken
I was going to the store with my wife but chicken go by herself
9. Wheelchair
We only have one soda but its ok wheelchair
10. Chicken wing
My mom plays the lottery so chicken wing
11. Liver
A bully was messing wit my sister and i told him to liver alone
12. Body wash
I wanted to go to the bar but no body wash my kids
13. Budweiser
That woman over there has a nice body, budwieser face so ugly?

Single vs. Engaged vs. MARRIED!!

Sipping her drink, the single girl leered and said, “Last Friday at the end of the work day I went to my boyfriend’s office wearing a leather coat.  When all the other people had left, I slipped out of it and all I had on was a leather bodice, black stockings and stiletto heels.  He was so aroused that we made passionate love on his desk right then and there!”

The engaged woman giggled and said, “That’s pretty much my story!  When my fiancé got home last Friday, he found me waiting for him in a black mask, leather bodice, black hose and stiletto pumps.  He was so turned on that we not only had sex all night, he wants to move up our wedding date!”

The married woman put her glass down and said, “I did a lot of planning.  I made arrangements for the kids to stay over at Grandma’s.  I took a long scented-oil bath and then put on my best perfume.  I slipped into a tight leather bodice, a black garter belt, black stockings and six-inch stilettos. I finished it off with a black mask. When my husband got home from work, he grabbed a beer and the remote, sat down and said:   “Hey, Batman, what’s for dinner?”

IHateLongGoodbye’s